The Liquid Kosmos

Body Building

Yes, I went to GNC tonight. Must have been about 20 minutes before closing. Let me tell you, I don't know if I've ever seen anyone else in that store besides me. How they stay open is beyond me... but then again, everything in that place will break the bank.

"How much is this back-up powder scoop?"

"$23.99"

"Oh."

Anyway, I walk in and no one is there. Not even a worker. I walked around for about 5 minutes and nothing. Hello?? Anyone here??

I haven't stolen anything since I was 7 years old (when I unconsciously shoved a box of pop tarts in my back pack at Buzz's Wildcat and subsequently got caught by the mean lady) but I tussled with the idea that I could walk out of GNC with a year's supply of Protein Powder.

Luckily I didn't because dude came out of the back room all jacked up on roids, and I shit you not he asked me, "Can I help you with something?"

Uhh, yeah, I was hoping you could go behind your little cash register and let me buy this product that your store sells.

Maybe he was watching me on camera from the back room and saw that, "I could rip this place blind" look in my eye. Whatever it was he had quite an attitude with what could easily have been his first customer of the day. Then the bastard had the nerve to try and up-sell me.

"Have you thought about trying this GNC version of that product you have?"

Not really, what's the difference, I say. And he starts looking at the box...

"Well, this has 6 more grams of protein than yours."

Oh, is that right?? Just get your ass behind the counter and swipe my card.

posted by The Oscillator @ 7:32 PM